I just read a post by one of my favorite authors/bloggers – Jen Gresham of Everyday Bright and the Luminaries Club. “It’s obligation and fear that tells us we must do more … or else.”
At the core of Jen’s post is that if you find value in what you are doing, you are not wasting your time. And if you are doing something because others think you should, well you might want to rethink it.
I have been struggling since December 2014. First, because a stupid choice cost me a lot of money and that loss has snowballed. Second, I assumed that a second stream of income would solve all my problems. What I failed to consider, or rather considered, but ignored, is that I do not enjoy being my own boss. It is an anathema for me. Even the thought of working for myself makes me feel ill. All of the secondary streams of income that I have been pursuing all require me to be my own boss. An entrepreneur.
As a result of my utter dislike of entrepreneurship, I have procrastinated for the last three months. I signed up for Wealthy Affiliate thinking I could “study” my way into an online business – nope has not worked – I’ve spent hard earned money that I have basically thrown away. Three months and zip to show for it, not even a finished course.
I also thought I could Freelance Write my way into a second income. I signed up for a course – again, mostly a waste of money. Although I may work through the course because I believe it has value and can add value to my writing and editing – I have come up with some cool ideas and heck I may do the necessary research, interviews, etc. and pitch the ideas to Huffington Post.
I love to learn new things – it is a true joy in my life. The idea that I have to put Graduate School on hold because I was so worried about making extra money that I procrastinated myself right out of being able to apply is deeply distressing and disappointing to me.
The one thing that I am doing that I believe has value and I am looking forward to pursuing is NEPA certification. The meaningfulness behind the certification is that it is not just classes for classes sake, but it will allow me to do more with my editing at a job I very much enjoy.
And as Jen put it “When you focus on what’s meaningful [to you], you bring less stress into the world. Less angst.”
I want less stress. As I’ve written this post, I’ve considered my options – I can cancel the Wealthy Affiliate course/website and free up those funds. I cannot cancel the writing class – so I may as well learn something from it, even if I never pitch a story or write for a magazine, there is value in the knowing how.
And I enjoy writing this blog – it is not to make money, but to simply be and share my knowledge with others. If something I’ve learned, perhaps the hard way, can provide value and meaning to someone else, then I will be a very happy person.